But the essence of this article is to share the story of someone I met, who desperately wants her story to be shared as she believes it might help someone. According to her, drugs, self motivation, anti-depressants, groups and all other prescribed remedies did not seem to be helping. In fact the consciousness of attending group meetings because she was depressed was depressing for her. Then one night she had an experience she would like to share. We might not accept it, but let us remember that it really happened to somebody like us.
"The night was cold and soft droplets of raining kept hitting the roof. I was lying on my bed listening to the grinding sound of my neighbour's generator. As I rolled from one side of the bed to another my mind kept drifting. At the time of this incidence I had a lot of challenges,and was severely depressed but the most pressing trouble at that time was that I was in my third year in the university, so I was supposed to be on my six months industrial training, but as at that time, two months had passed and I had not gotten a placement. Time was against me, and most of my mates had started long ago.
I was frustrated,restless and angry. Just think of any word to describe a bad mood. I tried to picture my future and all I could project was a hopeless and helpless me. I couldn't see anything good about my life. I tried to play games with my phone but my battery was low and I wasn't even doing well in any of the games. I dropped the phone, annoyed. There were voices in my head telling me all kinds of things, I could hear a voice saying that I was going to end up a spinster for life, another voice was saying that I was going to be barren, another voice was saying that I wasn't born to be happy. I felt so dejected. I started crying, I tried to practice the faith talk I was taught in church. I repeated every bible verse I could remember but I felt worse. I tried to hold the God responsible for my bad night. I tried talking to Him, but I didn't know what to say . I felt He was just silent and not in the mood to talk. The voices in my head seemed to be screaming so loud by now I started crying. I thought of waking my sister who was beside me, then I thought of going to wake up my mom to tell her that I was going crazy but I knew what she would have said. Next I heard a voice in my head saying that I was depressed and that I needed help. It was already a fact that I knew but I took my phone to check the meaning of depression all the same and the definition defined me. I decided to browse the net about depression and all the descriptions I saw matched me. I then saw a link for an online depression test. So I clicked on the link and took the test. There were 20 questions to answer and when I was through, the result came out as severely depressed and the advice was for me to see a therapist or a specialist immediately. I went further to browse the treatment and drugs but they all seemed useless to me. My mind kept on going to the bible but I didn't know what to look for.
At a point I thought of going to the kitchen to stab myself with a knife but I thought of the pain my mum would go through having just lost my dad 4 years ago. I didn't know what to do so I silently prayed to God to take my life in my sleep. Suddenly a thought came to my mind. I picked my phone and googled "bible verses about depression", when it opened I clicked on the first link and that was the beginning of my healing. The first scripture that caught my eyes was
Philippians 4 vs 8:And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.
It hit me like cold water.I hungrily read the second scripture which was
Deuteronomy 31 vs 8:Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you.”
I couldn't believe the effect these scriptures were having on me. I hungrily and hurriedly read the remaining scriptures they were about 7 of them, I read them over and over again. I practically gobbled down the scriptures. It was like my spirit was lifted from a very dark hole. I was full of joy and peace. I was so happy that I started singing praise songs that just found their way into my mouth. I went crazy with joy. It was like I was hypnotized. All of a sudden my lost appetite returned with full force. It was around 2:30am by this time. I hurriedly went to the kitchen and took the left over salad from the fridge. I ate like I hadn't eaten in weeks. I was overjoyed. I started writing this. I didn't want to loose it. Finally around 3:20 am I slept. So peacefully did I sleep that my mum found it difficult to wake me up in the morning. I woke up more refreshed than I had been in days. This incident was a true life incident, and God healed me that night. Each time it seems like am getting depressed again I go back to those scriptures and it works everytime. That night, my problems were still there but they suddenly became meaningless and weightlessness to me. I suddenly felt dilly for worrying about those things. I have always wanted I would share this story and I am grateful for this opportunity"